This is great

On the right hand side are the things that people, lovely, thoughtful, kind, well meaning people ALWAYS, say to me.  I try not to get upset.  But when you have heard them all a hundred times or more it starts to get depressing.  

This Instagram post made my remember that, whatever people say, what they really mean is 'I love you', 'I care', 'I don't really know what to say to make it all better'.  TBH you don't need to make it better, just be there.

I Am Trying To Believe In Miracles

And you shall remember the whole way that the Lord your God has led you these forty years in the wilderness, that he might humble you, testing you to know what was in your heart, whether you would keep his commandments or not.

Deuteronomy 8:2 

Happy Blogiversary

It has been a year since I started this blog.  Looking back I can't believe how much my life has changed and how happy I am.  

I have got a new job, which isn't without it's challenges, that I absolutely love.  I have most definitely got my teaching mojo back.  

After becoming more conscious about my overall health, I have begun to take matters into my own hands.  I go to fitness classes, hike and swim every week.  I have upped my fruit, vegetable and calcium intake and lowered my fat, sugar and alcohol (I am pretty much tee total now). I am healthier than I have ever been.

Fertility wise, I don't feel any closer to the goal.  I recovered from my op quickly and have to be honest I had extremely high (slightly unrealistic) expectations.  My cycles were 60- 90 days long, when this all began, are now 22-28 days long and while this is fantastic, I'm still not 100% sure I actually ovulate.  Which is the whole point surely?  I have a few appointments coming up which will hoepefully clear everything up, fingers crossed.

I have become more conscious of making sure that the time GO and I spend time together is worthwhile.  We have been on so many day trips, and weekends away.  We have coming with nature, been out for amazing meals and made the most of our National Trust membership.

What a year I have had, it has been full of highs and has been lacking in lows, which after the past few years is a great improvement.  Let's see what the next year on the blog brings.

TTC - again

Many moons ago GO and I decided we would give the trying to conceive until January (6 months after the drilling) and then we would begin to look into adoption.






I have always wanted to adopt a chd, there are so many children looking for a home, and we are looking for a chance to love and be parents. Being a biological parent is not a priority for me, I just want to be a mother. Since meeting GO I have always wanted to see what we would produce genetically speaking.






With this in mind, after returning from Christmas withy parents, I went for my six month check up. I explained my plan to my GP, who shocked me with her reply.






In essence she told me that I should keep on TTC, as I am in the prime of my life and really given anything a chance yet. I will be able to adopt well into my forties, but this may be my only chance to conceive naturally.






So after a but if a break we are how back on the TTC schedule, all be it with less focus. No temperature tracking, mucus, or accupuncture. We are taking our times and enjoying ourselves. We haven't given ourselves a time limit. We are just taking things as they come.






Fingers crossed, hoping for babydust xxx

Needing baby dust

I've had a rough four of days.  I was absolutely whacked Friday night so I went to bed early. On Saturday I felt awful, I struggled to keep anything even tomato soup down.  I slept for much of the day and just couldn't move.  I did manage to take a couple of ovulation tests which had very faint lines.  By Sunday I was feeling better, another test showed another faint positive, we got down to some baby dancing.  I had pains in my side, which along with the tests led me to believe that I was actually ovulation, I was over the moon.  I couldn't believe it, I popped into the GP to have a quick check up. She said that my longer cycles were probably anovulatory, and so on day 21 of my next cycle, I would need a blood test.  I thought nothing more of it, until tonight.  I found blood in my underwear, I think I had convinced myself this would be our month...